I'm listening to The Beginner's Goodbye by Anne Tyler, the story of a man who loses his wife in a freak accident (an ancient tree falls on her as she sits pouting in their sun room). The new widower is an editor for "The Beginner's" series of informational self-help books so if it helps, you can think of the book's title as "Goodbye for Dummies".
I think I can relate to Aaron's subsequent desire to be left alone and his lack of concern about his own health or anything else and his confusion and mind games and his just-going-through-the-motions. What is so interesting (to me at least) is that his wife, the object of his love and devotion, is gradually revealed to be an unattractive, unsympathetic and generally un-likable person. Not a bad person, not an unstable or dumb person, just not the person you would think would inspire Great Love. Yet there it is, 100% believable.
Why did he love her? To him, the traits that others might find nerve racking were her most endearing. Her physical imperfections were his "turn ons". Even her cold bedside manner with her patients (she was a doctor), he saw as an asset.
Lucky for us mere mortals, we don't need to be "perfect" to be loved.
:-)
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